Okay I sort of got really bored because currently I am on a one week break from school after the exam. So I decided to venture into this topic. Please take note that this is my own experience.
Let's start from BMT (:
Honestly the time from after Moses graduated, well when we both graduated from polytechnic, it was full of new experiences, like both of us finding jobs to earn money. But the crucial point was I think about a month before he was going to enlist? Things got a bit more edgier, for me I guess I was not very comfortable thinking that I was only going to see him only maybe once a week or not at all, given that at that point of time I was working full time in a laboratory. I think what kind of helped was cutting down the time we spent together during poly, like we were meeting each other every single day in poly including saturdays and sundays because sunday is Church day and at that point of time I already started attending church with Moses.
We tried not to find each other or we lessened the time we saw each other in school because it was our final year in poly and I had Final Year Project and he had modules and internship. His internship was during the first half of the year, so it was a huge transition because they could only mean that I would only see him during the weekends. Or if we were even lucky that he finishes internship early for that day he could come down and see me at school and we would go home together. So during the second half of the academic year, I got busy with more things to do in FYP and had to start preparing for the FYP report, while Moses also had a FYP to do and with his modules. So if he had to go off earlier he would come by to the laboratory in school (I was doing internship-linked FYP in school so I was in school doing FYP and spent all my time in the labs) to tell me that he was gonna go home first.
So with this little transition we sort of got used to only seeing each other maybe once or twice a week, sometimes slightly more. But as the enlistment date started to inch closer, I got more insecure. I was scared that he would leave me (for what I also have no idea why) as there were so many rumors and stories about young couples breaking up during the time when the guys go to army. I was worried that because of the time we were able to see each other was gonna be cut down so much, I feared for the worst for this relationship. I knew that during this period I won't be able to call or text Moses as much as I want to, I can't do it freely, as in he wont be able to reply freely because they will be busy training. We definitely talked this out and Moses assured me that there's nothing to worry about, honestly it's all just guys.
On enlistment day, I took leave to go with him to tekong with his family. Although I felt like I wasted hours of my time there because most of the time we were separated from each other. But the breaking point was when we had to say our goodbyes, not going to see him for 3 weeks confinement, was so painful for me. I held back my tears because I didnt want him to worry about me, but in the end he told me he knew I was tearing up already.
The 3 weeks of confinement was a new experience to us, not being able to talk to each other freely. But what helped was looking forward every night to the phone calls. It was my most treasured time I had with Moses and he would tell me what happened that day, what he was facing. It helps me to understand what he was going through and I know being there for him and listening to him was good enough for him.
As the days go by, it was kind of manageable because being able to hear his voice at the end of the day made everything so much better. And getting to see him on the weekends was always something to look forward to after a 5 day work week. However, there are days that don't go as well for me, especially when I need to talk to him urgently and needing his comfort, he can't be there for me and only I can wait for his call at night. Also, during his field camp for a week was the worst because there wasn't gonna be any calls for the whole week. Also the night before his field camp started, the last phone call he could make before the field camp was very very rushed. Because, my parents insisted on catching Ah Boys to Men ON that very night and insisted that I go too when I have already watched it once. So I had to answer the phone call outside the cinema, I nearly cried.
POP was a day for the recruits that they were happy about because after that would be their new vocation and new experiences, whether they would go to Officer Cadet School or other places like medics. And the boys had a one week break from army. Sort of like a short holiday. It was also a day that I felt so proud of Moses for being able to go through BMT and finally passing out! Also, it was a day that I never ever got up so early before. HAHAHA. Even though the whole thing was sweaty and smelly, I was just glad to be there to share this moment with Moses.
Moses eventually got posted to OCS, so so proud of him! It is not easy to make it into OCS, to be eligible to get into OCS, one must obtain a Gold award for IPPT. Eventually Moses signed on with the AirForce.
Things from there started to go smoothly because after his training for OCS airforce was finishing and with the social night dinner, commissioning... then he was off to his next vocation. I guess really the hardest part was the beginning during BMT and field camp, but from then it was quite alright as both of us gotten used to it. His next vocation allowed him to go home everyday which was better, sometimes if possible we would meet in the evenings for dinner, but that was very rare given that I had evening classes to attend, and I need to use the time after work to study if there weren't any classes scheduled that evening.
Moses has now gone into studying at NTU, he's staying in Hall which is sort of nearer to me but it's the other end of the country for him hahahahaha! We meet sometimes during the week, but during his and my exam week we don't meet up because us meeting up means not studying already. So to let each other focus and do our best for our exams, we tend to not meet up unless for dinner only on rare occasions. We still meet up on Saturdays, but nowadays because I am in my final year of school, some weekends I have full day classes so we only can meet for dinner. Other than that, it's pretty alright (:
As a girlfriend, no doubt it hasn't been easy, but what we should do as girlfriends of those going through army, is to;
1. Be his pillar of support
Just be his listening ear, just let him talk about their day and trying to understand is actually good enough for him. Even though it sounds like too little, but at the end of the day of physical training, all he wants to do is talk to you and sometimes to just listen to your voice as well(:
2. Trust him
Letting him know that you trust them is quite an important thing, after all, he wouldn't want to hear that his girlfriend has trust issues and it can be quite frustrating for him. And girls, they're mostly guys in there. So what's there to worry about? (:
3. Let him decide what to do on the weekends
You can always make suggestions but ultimately let him choose. Sometimes he just wants to stay at home because he's been through tough training the whole week, and he also wants to spend time with his family, alongside with you. There was a time when Moses said he just wanted to stay home and have dinner with his family so I just went along with it.
4. Write letters for him
I didn't manage to write to him for field camp, but if you go to the enlistment with your guy, you can ask them for 1 envelope for yourself. I didn't know I could do that so I didn't ask and I had no idea when Moses' family was going to send so I just sent a short text to Moses before he went for field camp. For me I tend to hand write letters to Moses as it has a personal touch, to encourage him. He appreciates them a lot and some of the letters he leaves it in camp where he stays in for the week.
5. Do things together on the weekends
Try to bake or cook together on the weekends. Moses and I baked cookies together once and because he could bring in food to the camp, we baked like 2 batches of our own edited recipe of chocolate chip cookies. It was quite fun honestly.
6. Make the most of time together on the weekends
As you already know, the time that you get to spend together with him will be very limited. I know girls have their bad days but still try to not let that get in the way(:
I think that's about all that I have(:
Next post would probably on eczema.
x
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